Sunday, January 30, 2011

8 & 10

currently i am 13 weeks pregnant, but i have been saving these for a few weeks. i had been wishing, hoping, praying to make it to 12 weeks, to be "in the clear", but that day came and went with many tears. this whole week has been incredibly emotional, especially when i went to my dr appointment on wednesday and they could not hear a heartbeat on the doppler, tried an ultrasound and could not find one that way either, finally after about 15 minutes we were able to see the baby moving around and a heartbeat (mind you its the old not so fabulous machines that are in the room instead of the high tech amazing ones the u/s tech's use). i was a basket case. not that wednesday was the first time i have balled my eyes out to my doctor. we had an amazing 15 minute conversation in his office about my friend who lost her baby, my 4 previous miscarriages, and God's perfect plan for each life that HE creates. it was the most encouraging conversation i have ever had with any doctor. i mean i know all of the right answers, God is in control, He is the Creator, He gives and takes away, blessed be His name... however, sometimes, especially in the midst of pain those almost seem like empty words on a page. i know that He is in control, even if the life of my baby does not go the way i desire it to. its still hard to trust. so each day i try to make a conscience effort to give Him my heart, my life, and the life of my husband, Eli, Levi, baby #7 (fruitcake/sweetcake/button depending on who you ask), daughter/s in africa and loved ones. im still a work in progress.

belly pictures from 8 weeks

baby at 9 weeks

belly shots 10 weeks

Levi walked up and kissed my belly himself while i was shooting the picture

and Nikon has my camera so no 12 weeks :-(


Katy said...

Hey Keely!

Congrats on your and Chris's newest addition! We'll be praying for the health of you and the baby. Also, congrats on building the new house in Five Points! What a fun and convenient place to live! I know it will be tough being so far away from Chris for a while at your Mom and Dads. Judd and I will be praying for you guys during that time.

I was sorry to hear about your friend losing her baby last week. I know you will be a good and considerate friend. You are so good at that. I wish God didn't chose to use suffering so much in our lives. I'm learning to accept it though. There's a song that I've been listening to a lot lately that asks, "Where were You when my world came crashing down? When I lost all that was dear to me? When I was so scared and felt so alone? . . . You were on the cross." I'm learning so much right now and even though my circumstances have gotten worse lately, I'm finding a refuge under the shadow of His wings and sweet fellowship with HIm that I haven't had in a long time. I think having a baby became an idol for me when God withheld that gift and I became bitter. It's so tough and I wish and pray that God will bring blessing upon my life again one day. Right now, His Presence is becoming more than enough.

Love you guys!

In His Hands,
Katy :)

Jenni said...

who named them button? I like it! I may use it!

EnglishProf said...

button sounds like a girl...hmmm... how about jelly bean?
am SOOOO glad you and your little one are moving along :)

a&p said...

keely, congratulations on this pregnancy! i'm so happy for you :)

a&p said...

keely, congratulations on this pregnancy! i'm so happy for you :)