emotions

when emotions get high

i feel like

crying my eyes out

yelling at the top of my lungs

going for a nice long run

(btw the yelling is not directed at people just going to an open field and yelling since no one can hear me)

but for now i sit and watch little rascals with my boys (when i should be cleaning for the millionth time)

my new hobby

after two simultaneously loud, throw ones self on the floor and kick and scream type of tantrum from both boys about coming inside to take a bath (normally they love baths, but the "worked" so hard yesterday that they were exhausted), i had a brilliant idea... i should take up hunting... its a mindless quiet refuge, away from people in the midst of the simplicity of nature! ahhh pure joy!!!

just for the record the bath was the perfect 45 min to change their attitude and run down the clock until the it was bedtime.

hunting may also have been spurred on by having an 8pt buck living in our back yard!

Eli Conversations

K: Eli, please do not do that at the dinner table
E: Mama, please stop whining
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E: Mama, you picked your nose and have a boogie man in your hair
K: Eli, I did not pick my nose. My hair is wet because i have gel in my hair so it stays curly
E: Brobro picked nose and put boogie man in your hair

___________________________________
E: what DAT is???
K: Eli, what IS THIS

(insert his middle school girl attitude)
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E: Mama I WANT ALMONDS SOOOOOO BAD (note loud voice and after he ate 5 pancakes and 2 pieces of bacon)
K: Eli you just ate, you do not need any food (note normal tone and volum in my voice)
E: shhh mama you cant hear me, please may i have almonds please (in a whisper)

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E: I like to eat Chit
Chit= chick for chick-fil-a

goodbye friend

i just returned from a coffee date with a precious friend who is moving across the atlantic to a distant land. she has been such a wonderful encouragement, great person to bounce things off of, share my dreams with, and always loyal, honest, and encouraging. i will truly miss her and her sweet family. i am very thankful for skype, vonage, and emails!

know you will be missed and that you are loved

there are no goodbyes only see-ya-laters!

autumn upgrade

ok just tickle my fancy and click on my blog instead of reading it in google reader... i upgraded my look and added many more friends whose blogs i read.

thanks

oh and btw i actually like comments

you know just in case you didnt know that

thankful tree

so a fellow blogger posted this thankful tree... im not even going to begin to believe that im as artistic but i loved the concept so i tried my best to make our family a thankful tree. for every day we will all say one thing that we are thankful for... so far on the list are:
each other by name
music
Rachel Ray (my bff not the cooking star)
Eli & Ellie our sweet adored twins in Uganda that our heart aches for because we will not meet them, at least not right now (twice the chance has been taken away)
Judd
washing machine
parenthood (the show)
and many other great things

but most importantly the cross that Jesus took upon Himself for our sins

this is such a great reminder to stop each day and THANK Jesus for all He has done, is doing and will do for us instead of just praying for our needs and wants.




we love and miss you dearly sweet friend!

my hope

Luke 1:45
"blessed is she who has believed that what the Lord has said to her will be accomplished"

unexplainable

i am so distracted these days...

so distracted by a concept to most

but its not concept to me... its reality

majority wont understand and that doesnt sit well with me

but my reality is my reality

my feelings are my feelings

and i dont really care what you say or dont say

im not trying to impress you, win your favor, or even be your friend

i am following my heartstrings and loud speaker callings

i know without a shadow of doubt that the Lord has broken my heart for His purpose

i know that He has broken my heart and calls me to pray in the middle of the night every night as of the last couple of months

i know that He has a plan, even when it is not my plan

its hard... oh so hard... some days down right impossible

im so tired of saying goodbye... baby after baby after baby (beginning long ago)

i cant even count how many i have had to release...orphans to death, an orphanage, or someone else adopting them, and physically by miscarriages...

my heart yearns, aches, breaks for the babies/children of ours that the Lord has
called us to welcome into our home... but how, when, and where are still questions in the air... clarity, wisdom, discernment, direction oh my Lord

Starry Night

From the Birds that Sing, In the Tallest Trees.
To the Human Life, of you and me.
From the Desert Sands, to the place we stand.
He is God of All, He is Everything.

I'm giving my life to the only One who makes the moon reflect the sun.
Every Starry Night, that was His design.
I'm giving my life to the only Son, who was and is and yet to come
Let the praises ring, 'cause he is everything

From the autumn leaves, that will ride the breeze
To the faith it takes, to pray and sing
From the painted sky, to my plank filled eye
He is God of all, He is everything

I'm giving my life to the only one who makes the Moon reflect the sun
On that Starry Night, He changed my life.
I'm giving it all to the only son who gave me hope when I had none.
So let the praises ring,
Oh Let the Praises Ring

pumpkin patch & corn maze

not as awesome as the midwest... but we still had so much fun making memories as a family!